In the primary stage of our lives, the notion of us is created by the idealistic amalgamation of the mother and baby. Gradually, it casts on us that we are physically divided from our mothers and fathers. Earlier we concede that we have a divided body and then we structure our characters according to the feedback from our parents.
As we reach the prime of our lives, we succeed in jobs which help in to build up into distinctive human beings and acknowledge that we can never again be unified with another human. We might try to acquaint ourselves with another person but it will always be from a certain essential distance.
No one can actually understand another person’s conception of realism, so if we want to get familiar with another person, we should commune with him. Since we want our life partners to see us the way we want to be seen and to certify our sensitivity and considerate by having the same mind set as ours, it becomes both exasperating as well as complicated.
But everyone have their own thoughts and understanding of life, which makes them live in their own world different from ours. An obvious understanding and acceptance of this difference is the beginning real attachment with the other person.
The method of wanting to be acquainted with the other person initiates the understanding of attachment. Irritation and disputes are part of this method and those people who understand this thing are more apt to work on this method.
It is said that if you want to know another person, you should first know yourself, meaning that if you want to come to terms with another person’s divide, you must first come to terms with your own divide, or else a mixture can be made of two different people but closeness cannot be created.
To receive higher levels of attachment, we should build up an independent value of ourselves, meaning that we should be aware of our value even if we are not being told by another person. This is care for our self.
We should not be dependent on others to tell us how significant we are and satisfy us because appreciation from people around us is not proximity. Actual proximity is when two divided people come together to acknowledge one another and accept each other’s faults and errors.